ESPN's Hoopgurlz Mark Lewis just wrote another great column about the recruiting process. The former college coach includes great advise including the following:
Weigh your coach's words carefully. The involvement of your high school or club coach is entirely up to you. You are under absolutely no obligation to include them in the process. Your recruitment is not a school activity and the fact that you may have played for a particular club team doesn't entitle them to participate in any part of your decision-making.
However, your coach's experience, background or relationships with college recruiters can be, and usually are, a great asset. If you choose to involve one of your coaches in the process be sure they know what kind of help you're looking for from them and how you and your parents would like things handled.
The NCAA doesn't limit calls to high school and club coaches outside of the summer evaluation period, and some recruiters will call them daily looking for insight and updates. It's not uncommon for some high school or club coaches to get caught up in the attention and forget that they're supposed to be in your corner, first and foremost. Don't hesitate to remind your coach that he or she isn't the information superhighway for college recruiters.
The choice of what school to attend is often the first major decision that a young individual will make. Looking for help from other relatives or friends isn't necessarily a bad thing, but be sure they have something constructive to offer. The ones who have been recruited or were college athletes themselves can share their own recruiting or playing experiences with you. You then have to connect the dots and figure out how that information might help or impact your own situation. Always be careful of overanxious and self-proclaimed experts who say you "need" to do this or "should" do that. The only person who knows what you need or should be doing is you.